Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Mommy, RN

Ever since I can remember I have wanted to be a nurse.  When I was three years old I would tell people that I was going to work at Norton's hospital in the nursery and take care of the babies.  I did fulfill my dream of being a nurse, although the thought of working in the nursery terrifies me!  I have become an ICU junkie!  I love going to work and taking care of the sickest patients in the hospital.  I have seen people live after being on their death bed.  I have held hands of dying people when no family was to be found.  Telling a mother that they have lost a child has to be one of the hardest things that I have ever done. The good days out weigh the bad.  I couldn't ever see myself doing anything else until one day when something literally inside of me changed my perspective.

When I was pregnant with Livi I was sick every day.  I had somehow managed to learn how to drive and hold a puke bag at the same time.  I LOST 25 lbs!  Great weight loss plan?  Not really.  People would ask me, "You aren't coming back to work after the baby are you?"  Well sure I am coming back to work!  I had worked hard to become a nurse and I loved my job, why wouldn't I?  I thought that I had it all planned out, because full time was only working 3 12 hour shifts a week, I would work mostly on weekends and my cousin and grandma would watch the baby the other times.  It was the perfect plan.  Early on a brisk November morning, all of that changed. 

After 30+ hours of labor it was time for a c section.  At this point, I didn't care how the baby came out, I was just exhausted and ready.  When they held her up and announced those words "It's a girl", my entire life changed at that moment.  She was tiny, healthy, and beautiful.  She was mine.  Before I ever left the hospital I had already started to think about what I was going to do when I went back to work.  The thought of leaving this precious little being made me almost hyperventilate.  After talking to Bobby I called my boss and worked out a part time position, working only 8 shifts a month.  This all happened before we ever left the hospital! 

After 6 weeks of maternity leave the day had come.  I had been dreading this day.  I carefully labeled all of the breast milk bottles in the fridge, had three changes of clothes laid out on the changing table.  All of the diapers were organized and ready to go.  A hand written note about what to do, when to do it, and what would happen if you didn't!  I packed up all of my pumping supplies and kissed her little cheeks about 50 times and then walked out of the door.  The tears started to come before I even got in the car.  I was going to be gone at night, hopefully she would sleep the whole time I thought.  After crying hysterically the entire way  to work, I somehow got out of the car, clocked in, and pulled myself together to work.  I loved this job, I missed work, I can do this!  Then after about three hours the dreaded phone call came.  My husband frantically wanting to know how to get her to stop crying.  I could her her in the background screaming and my heart was breaking.  By now I was engorged, I had not pumped since I left for work, and that is all it took.  My milk let down and I started to cry too!  Good thing that I work with some of the most wonderful people in the world.  They were amazing, they let me cry, let me go pump, and tried to help me make it through the night!
That was the hardest night that I have ever had at work, but I made it. 

After a few weeks we actually came up with a schedule and a solution.  On nights that Bobby was on call the baby would stay with my parents, and on nights that he wasn't, a friend of mine would go and be an extra helping hand.  It worked perfectly!  I only had a few tears when I would leave for work.  Before long I was actually looking forward to going to work.  It was my time.  Time where I could use the skills that I had worked so hard to learn, time to have adult conversations, time to have a little of the old Rach back.  It was the perfect balance. 

When I got pregnant with Frankie all of that changed again.  I knew that with another baby it would be harder to keep to the same schedule that we had.  Olivia was also getting to the point where she was crawling for the first time, trying to speak, clapping her little hands.  All things that I didn't want to miss, things that I wanted to be there for.  After another long discussion with Bobby we decided that I would cut my hours even more.  I would only be required to work 3 shifts a month.  In doing this I would have to fore fit any benefits that I had, but it was okay, we had found a solution.  It turned out to be the best thing for our family.

I realize that not everyone has the option of staying at home.  Some people do have the option and still choose to work full time.  Every person is different.  Every person is fulfilled in their own special way.  In no way does it make any of us better or worse with the path that we decide.  I am fortunate that I do have the option and the choice.  I am thankful for the hard work that my husband does.  I AM BLESSED!

There are days when going to work seems like a vacation and I can't wait to get there!  At the end of my shift I am ready to see those cute faces and get big sloppy kisses!  As parents we do our best, it is a learning process that I have come to find out never ends.  Whatever you do, whether you are a stay at home mom or dad, career parent, or part timer, as long as our family's needs are meet then we are doing our job.  Keep up the good work.  I'm just glad that I get to have my piece of cake and eat it too!!!

Monday, August 30, 2010

The purple dinosaur

Barney, Elmo, Dora, Sid, Clifford, Diego, Belle, Zoe, Ariel.  At first glance you would think that it was a cross between Mayberry and a strip joint.  In fact, these are the names of the characters that are on  television every day to entertain our kids.  Every where you go you can find Dora towels, Barney shirts, Elmo pillows, etc etc.  Whoever invented these characters I'm sure have enough money and revenue to buy a small country!

There are so many studies out there that talk about if your kids should watch TV, what they should watch, how much they should watch, etc etc.  While I think that some of these studies have some valid points, I think that some of them are also a crock. I would bet my next paycheck that half of the people who published these studies weren't stay at home parents with two toddlers. 

I admit it, my kids watch TV almost every day, and they have certain shows that they LOVE.  Seriously, if I had my choice to play with a wooden block or watch a purple dinosaur dance and sing, I would pick the dinosaur! What two year old wouldn't want to watch a girl with a cool backpack and a talking monkey speak Spanish?  For my kids it is entertainment, and somewhat educational.  For me, it is peace.  It means that I get to take a shower, fold laundry, or cook dinner.  It means that I get to feed my Facebook habit or have the occasional phone call to a friend.

Someone made the comment to me the other day that they thought it was amazing that at two years old Olivia knows all of her colors, knows the alphabet, can count to 15, and can sing a whole variety of songs (I'm sure that there are a ton of kids out there that can do that).  The person commented "I bet that you work with her all of the time".  I just smiled and said thank you, but it made me really think, "How in the world does she know all of this?"   While I do sit and sing songs with her and Frankie, and count the steps every time that we walk up and down them, I can't take all of the credit.  I have to give a shout out to my homeboyz  Elmo and Barney for all of their hard work and effort!  They have taught her something!

I think that the key is balance.  Should TV take away from outside play or reading time?  Absolutely not! We all know that too much of anything can be bad.  If I eat that bag of Doritos, my jeans won't fit!  If I drink that next martini, I may have a hangover , or even worse, get crazy and get knocked up again!  My point is that Dora and Elmo aren't going to make your kids stupid or fat if  you are responsible about it. Take that time when they watch their shows and do something productive, or just sit down and relax for a moment.  When it is over turn it off and go outside and play with your babies.  Nothing should take the place of your interaction with your kids, that is what they need, that is the attention that they crave, and nothing should ever replace it! 

Don't get bent out of shape if Elmo teaches your kids their colors first. If I could, I would give Elmo a tickle or two in gratitude for all that he has done for me!

Sunday, August 29, 2010

The countdown begins

They say that 30 is the new 20 right?  I am beginning to think that the person who came up with this slogan definitely isn't as worn out as I am.

When we are 14 we want to be 16, and at 16 we think that 18 is just around the corner.  After we turn 18 we can't wait to be 21!  What the heck was wrong with us, our whole lives up until this point we have been wishing away!

A few weeks ago I turned 29, and yes, I really am 29! Not 29+1, not the first anniversary of my 29th birthday, just plain OLD 29!  I know that those of you out there that are older than me are saying "oh, you are just a babe", or "29 isn't so bad?".  Well, think back to when you turned 29 and I'm sure that the anxiety of 30 being around the corner was on your mind too.

The past decade has been good to me.  I got my first job at the hospital when I was 18.  Soon after I graduated from nursing school at 20.  I was the "baby" of the unit.  I can remember when I was working day shift and I would stay out with the girls most of the night before, go home and shower, and work a 12 hour shift.  Now if I go out for a drink or dinner with the girls, first I have to take a nap before I go, and then I feel like I have taken a sleeping pill after one glass of wine. All I can think about is going home, putting on my PJ's and laying on my couch!

At 22 I meet my wonderful husband.  It was such a magical time in my life.  He was in his residency and I had just went back to school as well. We would have dinner dates in the hospital cafeteria or leave love notes on each others cars.  I think about all of the late nights, with class early the next morning, and then going to work after class...it makes me exhausted thinking about how we did it!  Now I know how we did, we were young and  in LOVE!

I was a bride at 24, now to some that seems young, but in my family I felt like the old maid.  My mom and dad were married at 18 and 19. My aunts and uncles most of the same.  Our amazing Hawaii honeymoon seems like a lifetime ago!  I loved those first few years of being married.  When Bobby would get called out to the hospital in the night I would go with him.  We would just get in the car some evenings and take a drive to see where the road would take us.  There were a few times that we almost ran out of gas, and actually one time we did!

At 26 we welcomed our first baby.  I can recall looking at a breast pump for the first time and thinking, and what exactly do I do with this?  Within a few weeks we felt like pros.  That led to us thinking that we could do this again, and by Livi's first birthday I was already 3 months pregnant with Frankie! 

Since then I have turned in my stethoscope for parenting books.  Instead of shopping for cute matching panties and bras, I find myself looking for something with "minimizer" in the title.  I now know the purpose of control top panty hose.  I don't color my hair for fun, but instead out of necessity of the gray hair that I am finding.  I feel older.  I am older. 

As I am gaining momentum on the downhill slide, I have decided to embrace my last year of my 20's!  What if I am excited about the possibility of buying a minivan?  What if I have to trade in my thongs for control top briefs.  I'm the happiest that I have ever been.  I'm a wife to the best man in the world, I'm the mother of two healthy, beautiful babies.  I have the opportunity to work part time at a job that I love, and still get to see my babies grow every day!  I have the best friends and family that a person could ever ask for!  I am loved!

Bring on 30, I am ready.  I might just get those thongs back out again after all! 

Friday, August 27, 2010

The little cart

There is only one thing that I hate more than laundry, and that is grocery shopping.  I loathe going to the grocery.  I try to go at night, after everyone is asleep, I can go by myself, get out of there faster, and not have to deal with the little cart.

We all know what the little cart is.  I can remember when I was little going to Brewers store with my mom and pushing the little cart.  In this day and time, not only do they have the little cart, but they have the car cart as well.  The car cart is a great invention, but is a cess pool of germs I am sure.  Every time that we  pull into the parking lot at Kroger the debate begins with Livi protesting about what cart she will choose.  The only thing that I have on my mind is exactly what I need to get, how fast I can find it, and the need to swing by the deli so that they will give the kids a free cookie to entertain them! 

So the debate begins, the little cart vs. the car cart.  I will start with the car cart.  While it can somewhat contain your kids and keep them from running wild in the store, I am sure that the roto virus is lurking on every inch of it.  The thing that I had never noticed about the car cart until recently is all of the potential hiding places on the inside of the car. 

I was doing my shopping and was amazed at how quiet and good Livi was acting.  I didn't hear her demanding something from every isle, and I was actually enjoying my shopping experience.  While unloading the contents of my cart at the check out isle I told Livi that she could pick out a treat for her and Frankie for being so good.  I thought that a bag of M&M's were appropriate.  I gave her the bag of candy, she watched ever so carefully while the lady scanned it, and to her delight, she handed her the bag of M&M's.  She got back into the car and quietly was eating her snack, or so I thought.  After unloading all of the cart, paying for the groceries, and starting to go out of the store something rolled out from the bottom of  the cart and made the wheel stick.  I bent over to pick it up and realized that it was a package of batteries.  I thought to myself, I didn't buy any batteries, and then it dawned on me.  I looked in the car to see Livi with all sorts of "paraphernalia".  Eight packages of batteries to be exact, a kit kat, a pack of lighters, and gum all under the bottom of the car cart.  About $40 worth of stuff.  What a little clepto! I asked her why she took all of these things and she just said "But mom, I needed that stuff".  To my horror several people were standing around and were witness to the almost shoplifting experience.  That was the last time we used the car cart. 

The little cart is a different ballgame completely.  Instead of the confinement of the car cart the little cart enables them to roam independently throughout the store.  While this can be a good thing because it will wear them out and they will be ready for a nap, it also allows them to be "that kid". The kid that gets in everyone's way, the kid that runs over your heels, the kid that demands that you need three jars of peanut butter and proceeds to put all three of them in the cart.  One day when Liv had the little cart she was actually being very polite, saying "scuse me" when she would pass other shoppers, even asking before she put something in the cart.  I knew that it was too good to be true and wouldn't last long.  While wondering down the chip isle she spots one of her favorite snacks "puffs".  She asked if she could get a bag of puffs and I told her that was fine. I watched her reach on her little toes up high to grab them, she did reach them but accidentally dropped them on the way to the little cart.  Upon dropping the bag, she looked up at me with the most serious expression on her little face and said "s#@t, I dropped it! "  My face immediately turned three shades of red and I scanned around to see if anyone could have heard her.  My luck, a man was standing there and just started to laugh, I was mortified!!!  We try to refrain from profanity at home, but you know as well as I do, sometimes those 4 letter words just pop out, and  now I knew that they had fallen on little ears.  I calmly explained to Liv that we don't use those words and tried to finish my shopping as fast as I could, puffs and all.

I have come to the conclusion that no matter what cart you use, there are always going to be times when a root canal sounds more appealing than a trip to Kroger.  So, the next time the milk jug is almost empty and only the heel of the bread is left, I will choose the little cart.  Although you come out with at least 5 things that magically appeared in the cart and the occasional bummed up heal, the look on that little face when she gets to push it just like Mommy is priceless.

I want a re-do!

Do you ever have those days where you feel like if you could just go back to bed, reset the alarm and wake up and do it all over again, that the second time it would be better?  Today is one of those days.

Livi woke up too early and was in a foul mood, which usually happens about 3 mornings a week.  Frankie on the other hand is bring eyed and bushy tailed, ready to eat, poop, and take on the world (or at least his play cars and blocks).  I had to be out of the house early this morning to run some errands and was trying to get everyone moving.  I decided to jump in and take a "quick" and I mean quick shower.  When I got out, I found this puddle of red on my carpet in the hall...red nail polish that is!  I immediately run into the kids room to find Liv with red nail polish all over her hands and feet and then I look at Frankie, it was in his mouth, on his lips, and all over his legs and toes.  Not only did Liv decide to paint her own nails, she thought it would be fun to paint Frankie's too.  After confiscating the nail polish, I start to work on the removal process.  I put them in the tub and scrub on them and decide that I will have to use the nail polish remover.  I wanted to avoid this because I didn't want to put anything on them that would irritate their skin, but it had to be done.  After 10 minutes of rummaging through every bathroom cabinet and every shelf in the closet, I realize that I have about 20 bars of soap, three extra shampoos and NO nail polish remover. 

Going through target I begin to wonder if anyone will notice the red all over my kids hands, feet, and legs, and then I tell myself, you are stupid, they all see it!!!  After buying about 5 other things that I didn't need, I got the nail polish remover and went to check out.  The cashier took one look at my kids and started laughing, and the harder she laughed, the more the steam in my head began to slowly come out of my ears.  Then the words "Your kids have nail polish all over them! hahaha!"  No flippin @#$% lady, really?  I hadn't noticed!! 

After we got home I was unpacking the car and trying to fix a quick lunch and I notice that Liv is being very quiet and good...I knew that something was up.  While Frankie was making a mess of his lunch I go into the sun room to find her quietly playing, knowing my daughter all too well I ask her, " Do you need to go to the potty to poop?" I get a quick "NO".  I asked again and she assured me that she was not pooping in her pants.  About 3 minutes later she comes in the kitchen and announces to me that she has poop in her pants.  Great, more laundry to do.  This is where I begin to have dreams about a martini, the ones with the great big olives in them, in a chilled glass.  No martini was had and a change of pants was in order.  After cleaning up the mess that Frankie made from his lunch it was now time for a nap. 

Nap time is a glorious time of day, the best time of the day!  So, maybe after nap time we can start over, reset this alarm, and turn this day around, just maybe!

Thursday, August 26, 2010

The sippy cup behind the couch...

We've all found them before.  You know what I am talking about, the sippy cup or bottle that amazingly has managed to disappear.  When you finally look under the couch or decide to pull it out to vacum, there it is.  Milk that has became cottage cheese, juice that has fermented into something 90 proof.  You take one look at it and decide that instead of vomiting from the smell when you open it, you would rather just put it in the trash.

When we first bought our house (which was before we had kids),  I can remember thinking to myself that this house was going to be spotless, neat, and orderly.  I am not the most organized person in the world, but I like the smell of Pinesol, I love the look of freshly vacumed carpets with the lines in them.  I take pride in the neatly mopped wood floors that are shining.  I come from a long line of "Domestic Divas".  My Mamaw Pat's floor is so clean that you could literally eat off of it.  She does all of her laundry every day, there are never any dirty clothes in the hamper.  She even cleans the toliet after every use...I know a little OCD, but still, it is in the blood.  My mom had a huge homemade dinner on the table every afternoon when my dad would get home from work (I blame my weight issues on that).  I thought that since I had been witness to such domestic greatness that it would come natural, that I would be super woman and be able to juggle everything.  No such luck!

Some days we wear our PJ's all day. Other days we play dress up and change clothes 5 times.  We take all of the toys out of the toy box and the kids get inside and play.  The diaper genie overflows, the laundry piles up till you can't shut the closet door.  Sometimes I almost cry at the thought of getting everything done, having the spotless house, but sometimes I just like to lie down on the bed when they are napping and watch them sleep.  Would I change the endless loads of laundry for no more dress up games? Absolutly not!!  Are my floors clean enough that you can eat off of them? Not at all, but Frankie does anyway!  I would not trade anything for the precious fun times that I have with my kids.  Everything will eventually get done, and if it doesn't, the cleaning lady comes every other Friday!  Ha ha!

My point to this is don't sweat the small stuff.  If there are days that you have time to clean your house and get all of the laundry done great, but on the days that it is impossible, sit back, order take out, and enjoy these moments.  The sippy cup will always disappear under the couch, even in the cleanest house!


I have been wanting to start a blog for a long time, but just had not made the time to do so.  It also has something to do with the fact that I am not a good writer, nor am I very computer literate, so without due, I will give this a try!

The Moldoveanu household has been in full swing this summer with many activities and fun times!  We started out in the spring by making a trip to Great Wolf Lodge in Cincinnati, OH.  Bobby and I thought that this would be the perfect first trip to take with the kids.  It was an awesome time!  The indoor waterpark was very impressive and the rooms were very spacious and kid friendly.  It is a little expensive, but for a weekend, it was well worth it!  After that we came home and Bobby had another week of vacation and it was so nice to have him home for two weeks!  Bobby never takes vacation time, in fact he had not taken time off in over two years, (other than when the kids were born) and it was past due.  I have so much appreciation and admiration for him.  His dedication to us as a family and his dedication to his patients is amazing.  I don't know how he manages to do it all, but he does!! 

On Father's Day weekend in June we went with my parents and brothers to Kentucky Lake for the weekend.  I was impressed with the vastness of the lakes and the beautiful area.  It was super hot though, and we spent the entire weekend in the pool with the kids, but it was great!  It was a very special weekend with my dad and my husband. 

By now Fourth of July weekend was upon us and summer was in full swing!  Bobby's parents visited over the 4th weekend and we had a great time catching up and visiting.  On Monday we celebrated the weekend at my Aunt Lori and Uncle Cliff's house.  It is a yearly tradition as long as I can remember.  We have a cookout, swim in their fantastic pool, eat, nap, eat, swim, ect, ect!  It is the only time of year that my dad will get in the pool with all of the kids, do his famous belly flop, while all of us adults laugh harder than the year before! 
We had a litte down time after the 4th and spent much of the next few weeks just doing our normal schedule! 

My Birthday was on August 14th and my brother came in town for the weekend.  We had a special dinner with my family at Pat's Steakhouse and it was so nice for everyone to be together.  The most special gift that I recieved for my birthday was Olivia woke me up and sang Happy Birthday to me.  To my delight, she has a beautiful little singing voice.  I love to sing, and it is so great that she does too, and even at two is somewhat on key!!!  I must say, it was the best version of Happy Birthday that I have ever heard.  Of course, Frankie just stood there and clapped and then gave me lots of head butts and loves!!

Now the time is upon us, the time that I have had bittersweet emotions about...first day of Preschool.  On September 8th Olivia and Frankie will start preschool a few mornings a week.  It is a good thing I know, but part of me is sad.  I have never left my kids with anyone but family and this is going to be a major step for me as well.  They are going to a church in our neighboorhood, and it is so close that I can almost see it from our house, but the anixety is still there!  Livi is so excited though, everytime we drive past she says "That is MY school".  She needs the interaction with the other kids as well as adults.  I'm sure that they will both do great, but I will probably have a few tears that first day

That pretty much sums up our summer for now!  We are planning to go to Florida in a few weeks and take our first Beach vacation with the kids ever!  I'm very excited and I will keep you posted on how things go!